


Wherever you are, I'll be there

by AStarlightMonbebe



Series: One Shots [2]
Category: NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: M/M, Sequel to 'Don't Tell Me Lies Don't Say Goodbye'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-12-17 01:57:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11841582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AStarlightMonbebe/pseuds/AStarlightMonbebe
Summary: There's a voicemail on Jonghyun's phone.(Minhyun misses Jonghyun)Sequel to 'Don't tell me lies, don't say goodbye'





	Wherever you are, I'll be there

**Author's Note:**

> This is way later than I wanted and much worse than I intended it to be, though I guess it could be worse. Halfway through writing I found out that I wrote both of these works in the wrong tense and it was too late to change it and I had the initial idea but it was hard to write....I really apologize to anyone who was expecting something a lot better than this probably is. Anyway, I meant to get this out on Tuesday or Wednesday but I didn't finish it until today-what can I say, when BTS hits it hits you like a truck and the theories just kind of consumed me.  
> If you comment or anything I might not get back to you for a while because I'm going on vacation and I don't think I'll have wifi but maybe I will. Who knows. Comments, kudos, all are appreciated. Enjoy! (Hopefully)

When Jonghyun gets back to his room and turns his phone on, he immediately notices that he has a voicemail. A voicemail from Minhyun. His insides turn to ice and for a second he can’t breathe. As much as he tries to tell himself it’s just a friendly check in call, that it’s nothing special, he knows it is because Minhyun hasn’t contacted him for almost a month. And now he has.

Jonghyun’s afraid to listen to it. He spends half an hour pacing the room, burying his fingers in his hair, hitting the wall, sitting down and staring at the screen. _One new voicemail._ The words bounce around in his brain until he finally slides down and takes off his baseball cap, ruffling his hair. He needs to listen to whatever Minhyun has left for him today or he won’t be able to work up the courage for it later.

Minhyun’s voice pours through the speakers of his phone as he hits play, leaning back to listen. “Hi. It’s Minhyun. I should have called sooner. I’m sorry I didn’t. I know that probably isn’t enough, just saying sorry. I am, though.” There was the sound of Minhyun drawing in a shaky breath. It sounded like he’d been crying. Jonghyun turned up the volume so he could hear his voice better, so he could hear what was wrong. 

“I just listened to Hello. Make sure to tell Minki that he did well. It was really good.” Another shaky breath. “Sorry. If you haven’t guessed already, I was crying for a while. I hope you haven’t been crying like I have.” Jonghyun’s heart breaks a little, because of course Minhyun has been crying. He can wish and wish that Minhyun is happy and hasn’t suffered, and Minhyun can wish and wish that Jonghyun himself hasn’t been crying but they both know that’s not the truth. 

“I wasn’t lying, you know. At the finale.” Jonghyun knows exactly what Minhyun’s talking about. It’s something he should regret, but he doesn’t. He can’t make himself regret it. “If you were, I get it. But, please, call me back when you get this, okay? So we can talk.” The message ends and Jonghyun rubs at his eyes.

It’s late at night, Minhyun is probably sleeping, but Jonghyun still calls him. The phone rings in his ear, once, twice, three times, and then stops with a click. He heard soft breathing on the other end, then; “Yeoboseyo?” “It’s Jonghyun.” Jonghyun says, without waiting for Minhyun to continue. He hears Minhyun draw in a sharp breath. “You got my voicemail.” It’s not a question.

“I did. Thank you.” Jonghyun pauses. “For calling.” “You’re welcome.” Minhyun says. The conversation is simple so far, neither one of them willing to talk about what they really need to. Jonghyun doesn’t want, but they need to, so he says; “About the finale.” There’s silence on the other end of the phone.

“You’re right.” Minhyun finally announces. “We need to talk about that.” There’s rustling and the sound of footsteps. “One second. I’m going out on the porch so we can talk in private and I won’t wake anyone up.” It’s an oddly personal thing to say, out of place. He talks about the other members casually, as if it’s a practice he’s used to, knowing where to go so everyone can get a full night of sleep without disruption.

They used to talk out on the back steps, back before Produce 101. Even if it was cold, or raining, or snowing, they talked out there if they needed to. That was almost every night, both of them quietly slipping out of their beds as to not disturb Minki or Dongho, who they shared with. Aron was the eldest, so he got his own room. To Jonghyun it seems like his whole life is split into three sections; before Produce 101, during Produce 101, and after Produce 101. _Or, with Minhyun, losing Minhyun, without Minhyun._

Jonghyun flips the phone around in his hands, a nervous habit he’s had since forever, while he waits for Minhyun to start talking again. Through the phone speakers he hears the distant voice of somebody else and then Minhyun’s voice, louder. He catches; “I’ll be there soon….tell Jisung to….okay, thanks.” 

“Minhyun?” Jonghyun asks. “Sorry.” Minhyun says after a moment or two of silence. “That was Guanlin. I have to go, but I can try to call you back later.” Jonghyun’s heart pangs. He misses Guanlin, definitely not as much as he misses Minhyun, but he still remembers teaching Guanlin about rap for the Fear performance and watching him grow and now, grow to debut. 

“Wait.” Jonghyun says. He hears Minhyun stop walking. “What?” “Are you free tomorrow night?” Minhyun pauses again. “Um, let me check.” There’s more talking and noise from the Minhyun’s end of the phone, none of which Jonghyun can make out. Minhyun returns quickly. “Yeah, I am.”

“Meet me at the playground, okay?” Jonghyun half asks, half states. “I will.” Minhyun promises, in a softer voice than before. Jonghyun nods, more to himself because he knows Minhyun can’t see it, and hangs up. He lets the phone fall onto the ground as he buries his head in his knees. 

The whole conversation felt weird, not like how they talked before. Stilted, that was the word. Stilted and awkward. There was no denying that something had changed, that they had changed in the months they had been apart.  
The door opens. “Jonghyun?” Minki asks, standing in the doorway. In the time it took him to look up, Jonghyun slashes away half formed tears quickly and straightens his clothes. “Yes?” He stands up, putting his phone in his pocket and trying to look relaxed. “Was that Minhyun on the phone?” 

Jonghyun freezes. He hadn’t thought anyone was listening. Minki didn’t wait for an answer, as if he already knew. “How is he?” Jonghyun forces himself to smile. “He’s doing well. He said he was settling in and that they were planning for a comeback.” Jonghyun makes sure to smile at Minki again. “He said you did well on Hello.” His voice trembles slightly on the last word.

Minki crosses the space between them quickly and hugs him, his skinny arms somehow squeezing the life out of Jonghyun. “You were perfect.” Jonghyun hugs him back and pretends that that was exactly what he was talking about. Minki hugs him harder. “Are you going to need me to cover for you tomorrow?” Jonghyun almost chokes on air, but instead says; “That would be nice.” He hadn’t realized Minki had heard the whole conversation.

Nodding, Minki pulls away. “Call me if you need anything else.” He says as he steps back out the door and closes it behind him. Jonghyun smiles to himself. It’s nice to see Minki being so caring, a side that he never showed in public though Jonghyun remembers many a time he found Minki crying in the bathroom after eliminations. Or even when it wasn’t an elimination. Minki has a big heart, he just hardly ever shows it.

The next night Jonghyun waits until Minki has successfully captured Dongho and Aron and dragged them off somewhere before leaving the house in sweatpants and a hoodie since it gets cold at night. The park is a couple of blocks or so away and Jonghyun makes sure to put up his hood just in case, even though it’s night and there’s barely any people around. 

Since the playground technically closes at sundown it’s abandoned, the structures of slides and monkey bars just barely seeable in the darkness. The gate is closed, and it’s noisy too, so Jonghyun jumps over the fence, landing soundlessly on his feet. Years of dancing have taught him well. 

He goes to the swingset and sits down on one of the swings, shoving his hands in his pockets as he wraps his elbows around the silver chains on either side of him. Minhyun and he used to come here a lot back when they could, just to sit and swing and slide down the slides and pretend they were children again. In the later days Jonghyun would escape to the playground when he didn’t want to have to smile for the others, when he thought he couldn’t. Minhyun found him everytime.

It was a little after nine now, and Jonghyun waits until ten, when he calls Minhyun. Minhyun doesn’t pick up, so Jonghyun just texts him to let him know he was waiting for him still. When it gets so dark that Jonghyun can barely even see the slide which is only a couple feet in front of him, he sees that it’s past eleven now. He waits a little longer.

And still, Minhyun doesn’t come.

~

They get back later than expected. Minhyun is exhausted after having to do a long interview and then getting crammed in the back with Jaehwan, who fell asleep on him, and Woojin, who had shoved Jaehwan unceremoniously over to Minhyun after Jaehwan had started falling asleep on him. 

The ground never felt better to Minhyun and his knees nearly give out when he steps out. Tingles go up and down them, they’d been in the car for at least three hours and Jaehwan’s head had been on his legs for half of the time, making them fall asleep. Half the maknaes were asleep and stumbling around groggily after being awoken, as a Hyung Minhyun was employed to send them off to sleep.

After he had corralled a sleepy and clingy Daehwi into his room and then a drooling Guanlin, Minhyun is ready to sleep. He’s getting ready to change when Seongwoo appears next to him and says; “Minhyun, don’t you have someplace to be?” Minhyun stares at him for a long time, his brain moving slowly as he thinks about what Seongwoo could possibly mean.

Then he remembers. Jonghyun. Minhyun scrambles to get his phone out of his pocket, turning it on and seeing that he has a single text from Jonghyun, asking him if he’s coming. Not bothering to reply, Minhyun shoves on his shoes and says a quick thank you to Seongwoo, who just nods knowingly. He doesn’t even know how Seongwoo knew about his phone call, but it was helpful all the same so he doesn’t ask.

The real test is getting out the door without Jisung noticing him and making him stay inside. He waits until Jisung is occupied by a disturbance that sounds like it was caused by Seongwoo, considering the amount of damage that seems to have been done. Quickly and quietly, Minhyun unlocks the door and slips out of the crack, closing it with much more caution than is probably needed. 

Pulling up his hood and face mask, Minhyun checks both ways for reporters or fans, then runs for all he’s worth. He nearly slips on the sidewalk multiple times due to it raining during the day, but that doesn’t stop him from putting his all in. 

He’s memorized the way to the playground and knows how to get there even if it’s from an unfamiliar dorm. By the time he gets there it’s way too dark to see clearly and for a second he thinks that he’s too late, given it’s past midnight by now, but then he sees a lone shadow on the swings, spinning back and forth slowly. 

Minhyun pulls himself over the fence, using his long legs to his advantage. He’s not the nimblest person alive, but he manages to get by because of his height. Jonghyun looks up as his feet slide on the damp mulch and he lets out a muffled curse. He smiles and Minhyun waves, standing up and making carefully making his way over to the swing besides Jonghyun.

“I thought you weren’t coming.” Jonghyun says, using the toe of his sneaker to draw patterns in the mulch. Minhyun plops down on the swing next to him. “We had an interview that went overtime and then when I got back I had to put all the maknaes to bed, Guanlin drools and it was kind of disgusting….” The smile on Jonghyun’s face fades a little bit, just a tiny bit that would have been unnoticeable to anyone else, but not to Minhyun.

“What’s wrong?” Minhyun asks immediately, swinging over to poke Jonghyun in the side. Jonghyun flinches, curling in protectively. Minhyun resists the urge to say ‘cute’. “It’s just...you’re happy with Wanna One, right?” Jonghyun kicks his self made pile of mulch and they both watch the pieces fly through the air and land on the ground not too far away.

He thinks about how to answer. “I am gradually learning to be.” Minhyun decides. Jonghyun nods. “I missed you, Minhyun.” He stares out across the playground. “It took you a long time to call.” 

“You could have called me.” Minhyun points out, but Jonghyun only shrugs half heartedly. “It wasn’t really meant to be like that, was it?” Nodding, Minhyun tips his head back to stare at the stars. “The finale. What I said to you.” There’s no response from Jonghyun and when Minhyun dares a look he sees that Jonghyun is staring at him with something unreadable in his gaze.

Minhyun doesn’t know what to say. His throat is suddenly dry and he swallows. “I know you think I lied.” “I don’t.” Jonghyun says quietly. “Because that would make me a liar too, wouldn’t it?” _Because I said the exact same thing, didn’t I?_ Is what he’s really asking. Minhyun has always known what Jonghyun really means.

“Jonghyun.” Minhyun starts. “I like you. A lot.” Why does he have to be so awkward all the time? “I kept telling myself that the time wasn’t right, that you had enough burden and I shouldn’t add to that. But that didn’t make what I felt go away. What I feel. I get that it’s not going to work and I, well.” He sighs. “I feel in between. I don’t belong with Wanna One just yet but I no longer have a place with Nu’est….”

“Is that what you think?” Jonghyun interrupts. Minhyun stops in surprise. “What?” Jonghyun’s lips quirk. “That you don’t have a place with us.” Minhyun chews on his bottom lip. “It’s just….” Jonghyun looks at him encouragingly. “How could you guys forget me so quickly?” A tear leaks out from his eye, slipping down his cheek.

Jonghyun’s lips part in surprise. “We didn’t _forget_ you Minhyun. I, we, miss you so much. The only way to deal with that is to produce and work and try and be busy so I, we, don’t have enough time to be sad.” Minhyun doesn’t miss the fact that he keeps messing up his pronouns. He laughs to lighten the situation.

“That’s a relief.” His heart still hurts though and the way Jonghyun looks at him, it’s like he knows that Minhyun cries at night when everyone’s sleeping and that sometimes the feeling of missing Jonghyun hits him like a truck, so hard that he can’t breath and ends up choking. “I was starting to worry.” His voice breaks on the last word and Minhyun swallows back a sob.

“Oh, Minhyun-ah.” Jonghyun whispers and Minhyun bends over, trying to muffle his sobs. He hears the creak of a swing as Jonghyun pushes over to him and gently lifts his chin. “Why didn’t we talk to each other sooner?” His voice is so soft, so Jonghyun, that it only makes Minhyun cry harder, so much that he almost misses what Jonghyun says next. “You know that I love you, right?”

Minhyun stops his crying for a second, hiccuping. “What?” He’s been saying that a lot during this conversation. Jonghyun grins widely, a real smile this time, not one of his tiny sad ones that he’s been smiling the whole night. “But I thought you just said that to make me feel better…” Jonghyun hits him. “Yah! Are you calling me a liar?!”

“Aniyo!” Minhyun waves his hands in front of him desperately to fend of any more attacks, but he’s not expecting Jonghyun to kick mulch in his face, which he does. He flinches back, yelping as he covers his face protectively. Jonghyun laughs, but it all eventually dies off until they are silent once more.

“Do you believe me now?” Minhyun wraps his hands around the cool metal of the chains. He wants to, he really does, but it doesn’t feel true. Or maybe that’s just his brain saying that it can’t be. Jonghyun sighs heavily. 

“You know, we’re going by Nu’est W now.” Minhyun thinks that maybe he heard that before, but he’s been trying to move on from Nu’est as they’ve moved on from him. “The W is for waiting.” Jonghyun continues. Minhyun’s head jerks upward. “We’re waiting for you. We miss you. Even if it takes over a year and half, we’ll keep waiting.”

Minhyun twirls in his swing. “Thank you Jonghyun. I guess we probably won’t be seeing each other for a while, so I have to say what I need to say.” He takes a deep breath. “It’s a bad time for a confession, we’re going to be apart for a long time, but I love you  
Jonghyun. I’ve loved you since sixteen and debut and you’re the strongest person I know and I...I’m not strong. I’m weak and a coward and I need you to breathe but I can’t have you. Living without you hurts, it hurts me so much, and I feel awful because I depend on you so much and I feel burdensome and I can’t get rid of what I feel even though I’ve tried. I’ve tried so hard, and I hid it for six years but I can’t anymore. I need you, Jonghyun.”

He can’t meet Jonghyun’s eyes. He feels like he’s burdened Jonghyun even more. Jonghyun doesn’t say anything for a long time, but then Minhyun hears him move and he looks up to see Jonghyun swing over and grab the chain of his swing, pulling it so that they’re nose to nose. 

It’s Minhyun who leans in first, but it’s Jonghyun who connects their lips. The kiss is short and sweet, partly because the only thing that’s keeping them together is their grips on the chains. When Jonghyun breaks away his eyes are shining, stars reflecting in them. Minhyun has never wanted to count the stars more than he has at that moment.

“I would wait forever for you.” Jonghyun whispers and smiles his lopsided grin and Minhyun loves him so much that he’s willing to wait forever for Jonghyun too.

**Author's Note:**

> The 'series' ends here, I don't plan on writing a sequel to this. I apologize again and hope it was satisfactory, the ending was a bit difficult because I needed an extra sentence to wrap it up but I couldn't really think of one but whatever. Side note: For some reason italicizing things only works the first time, can anyone help me with that? Anyways. Thank you for reading!


End file.
